Chazography

I put my “mad hacker skills” to work today as I started debugging a list library that I’d written in C for my Operating Systems class. Not that I’d ever write code that has bugs in it, but I must reluctantly admit that my list library did caus segmentation faults if run on certain input. It’s okay, though, because it was still in beta form. In fact, I think I’m going to start going the Google route with all my code. If you’re wondering what I mean by that, I’m talking about leaving pretty much everything I write in beta form for as long as possible or even indefinitely. Afterall, if it’s beta code and it doesn’t work, it’s pre-release with no guarantee of being bug free. If by chance it works terrific, I then become the super awesomest coder ever because even my beta code is “uber” stable. Actually, I’m going to one-up Google release all my code in “alpha” form and leave it there indefinitely. Yeah… that’d be sweet.

Okay, now that I’ve officially lost half my readership (maybe 3 or 4 people including myself) due to my excruciatingly boring and geeky rant above, I must find some way to entice them back. After many, many, many, many, many, many seconds of thought, I have decided that the best way to accomplish this goal is by creating a new gimmick. So here it goes:

Chaz Offers Sage Words Of Wisdom

I find that women are like computers. If you push just the right buttons, they will do exactly what you want. However, one incorrect line of code or improper key sequence, and the results could be completely unpredictable. Avoid at all costs the “Blue Screen Of Death” (a symptom that only plagues a few select type of women); it sends them into an extreme state of dysfunction and will most certainly require a reboot by “talking” and buying stuff. If these do not work, resolving the problem can often be difficult, and it may ultimately require a complete reformat and termination of the relationship. Beware of the Millenium Edition (ME) woman, though promising many things, she will probably crash a lot and simply not work as well the previous versions. Make sure to invest in frequent updates because there are many trojans and other pieces of malware out to steal control of your computer/woman from you. Finally, never….. and I mean never compare women to computers. They don’t like being objectified.